Everything is a choice.
First; a rant. I just made a statement. It is a statement that applies to nearly every person on the planet, so don’t start with me about how some people don’t have a choice. Don’t tell me about the people who are born with handicaps or who are born into poverty. Don’t tell me about something specific you are facing and that you have no choice in the matter. I get it. And by the way, people who are born into poverty and with handicaps often choose their way to success, happiness and prosperity. So don’t give me any of your stupid “But Larry . . .” arguments. I am tired of people coming up with all of the exceptions to everything I post. Of course there are exceptions. Very few things come without an exception of some kind. I can’t write a blog or a facebook posting that deals with every individual’s personal issues. I can’t write a blog that applies to 99% of the people while catering to you, the 1%. I don’t care that you were a middle child born in North Dakota of parents named Lester and Josephine who made exactly $42,936 a year and had an older sister with red hair, a buck-toothed little brother with Tourette’s and a pet rabbit named Floppy and because of all of that, you don’t have a choice; you can’t be healthy or skinny or successful. Yet that seems to be what some of you expect. Seriously folks, you should read my mail. So get over it before you even start. (Whew! I feel better. Now on to making my point.)
Everything is a choice. Health is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Prosperity is a choice. Integrity, honesty, honor, work ethic . . . all choices. Put enough good choices together and you end up with a pretty good life. String enough bad choices together and you’re screwed.
Success is also a choice. Just like being fit, happy and financially secure are all choices. But none of these things are one single choice. Instead they are made up of millions of tiny choices. For instance; eating one 5,000 calorie meal won’t make you fat. But eat a few hundred calories more than you burn every day for a period of years and you end up a tubby. Buying one pair of shoes that you can’t afford won’t make you poor; it might leave you broke until payday, but it won’t make you poor. But spend just a couple of dollars more than you really have to spend every day on a pack of gum or a soda or the like and before you realize it, you’re deep in debt with no way out.
One evening of mindless television doesn’t hurt you but if you do it night after night, your future could be ruined. Being late to work one time probably won’t cost you your job, but do it too often and you will end up unemployed. Don’t say “thank you” once and the next time it becomes easier and soon you will be perceived as ungrateful. Let serving one customer slide through the cracks and tell yourself “Oh well, it’s only one.” and soon you won’t have enough customers to stay in business. In every situation, success at anything comes down to little bitty choices. Choices that are so seemingly insignificant that we cant believe they would have any long term devastating impact, but they do.
Everything ultimately matters. Every little choice you make or don’t make either moves you closer to your goals or farther away from your goals. No choice is ever neutral.
The choices you have made up until now determine the level of successful you are experiencing right now. That’s just how life works: you live the consequences of your choices.
What direction are your choices taking you?
Larry,THANK YOU! It is so much easier to come up with an excuse than a solution and then to work on it. If you don’t like your life change your mind and go in another direction.Yes it takes work,but the rewards are great!
Great post as usual, Larry. I agree with the fact that nearly everything, if not everything, we encounter in a day is ultimately a choice. The problem I have noticed is people are so unwilling to accept consequences for their actions that they would rather put forth a set of, in their mind, uncontrollable circumstances that hinder their choice. But, as you outlined, such is not true.
Also, I found it kind of funny that you mentioned being a middle child born in North Dakota to a parent named Lester. All three of these fit me, in fact, I thought you were talking about me for a moment until I read the rest of the sentence. Being born in North Dakota to a family from there gave me a good grounding for the choices that I make. Historically, people from North Dakota have had the mindset of individuality and succeeding on their own merit, through the choices they make, and being no one but their own fault if failure comes their way. Of course there are exceptions, but for the most part this is the sense I got from my family from North Dakota and from so many other people there.
I. FREAKING. LOVE. YOU. Period.
I totally agree with you! I don’t neccessarily know how to fix some of my incorrect (bad) choices(screw-ups) lol but yes i sure agree Larry
Thank you Larry.
Great post, Larry. Very similar in message to a poem I once wrote called “Training”:
Training
There was a warrior poet
By name of Archilochus
Who’s motto about life
Has given me great focus
He said “We don’t rise to
Our expectation’s level
We fall down to our training”
This concept does dishevel
Many people who
Like to procrastinate
Who like to put off things
Until a later date
Lazy people who
Do not put in the work
Who have the chance to train
But always choose to shirk
And when the pressure’s on
They hope that they will rise
But do not see that lack
Of training’s their demise
There is a reason why
Our champions are great
They possessed common sense
To not just sit and wait
They trained themselves each day
And when their moment came
The level of their training
Is what achieved acclaim
There’s reasons why people
Who have gained much success
Got it and it’s not
Because Lord did bless
It’s ‘cause they did the training
They engaged every day
As a chance to try
To strengthen in some way
To deal with things like stress
And plans not going right
To not let disappointments
Dishevel or incite
So do you have a goal?
A dream you wish to chase?
Will you do the training?
Will you pick up the pace?
Do you have the patience
To understand it takes
A champion much time?
That there aren’t lucky breaks?
That you will not rise to
The level of ambition?
Instead you will fall to
Whatever your condition
Is when moment comes
The shape that you are in
Based on how you’ve trained
Decides a loss or win
~Miro
Larry,
My 23 yr old son is struggling with finding his path to success…i continue to share in a loving way your advice to all of us….
In a way, i see you as Uncle Larry to him….sometimes good stuff needs to come from someone other than Dad….
thanx
John in Tx
LARRY YOU ARE THE BEST AT WHAT YOU DO. AND EVERY DAY I AM WORKING ON CHANGING MY LIFE. READING YOUR BOOKS HAVE MADE ME WANT TO BE A BETTER PERSON AND I FEEL THAT I AM A BETTER PERSON NOW THAT I HAVE READ YOUR BOOKS. KEEP DOING WHAT YOU ARE DOING AND WE WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU FOR IT. I HAVE ALWAYS GOTTEN ON MY FRIENDS FOR DOING STUPID THINGS AND BEING IDIOTS SOME ARE GONE AND SOME ARE STILL HERE. BUT THE ONES THAT ARE GONE DON’T MATTER AND THE ONES THAT ARE HERE MATTER. THANK YOU!! I LOVE YOU.
amen!
be the ceo of your iife!
thanks larry 🙂
meadow
Larry you are so right everything is a choice. Sometimes you don’t choose the situation you are in but you certainly choose what you do about it.
The choices you make determine the life you lead.
LARRY YOU ARE THE BOSS!!! NO ONE DOES IT BETTER!
Vey well said. Every day we are faced with choices. The choices we repeat turn into habits. Our habits (good or bad) define who we are.
Awesome words, awesome message. Thank you for telling it like it is.
Thanks Larry. I realize it is high time I read ‘Shut up, Stop Whining and Get a Life’ again. I am an example of poor choices and attitude. I had a good job, but didn’t take the time to learn other areas of the job that surrounded me, nor educate myself so I had more to bring to the table. I whined and felt sorry myself because I was a single mom who had to take care of so much…..and let my children slide. That job is gone now, and I am not a young pup anymore. I have to have faith that it is never too late.
Larry — What I always like about what you say is that it’s not mind over matter but making a decision to do something and DOING it.
Larry, you hit the nail on the head. I have tried to teach this to my children yet a few of them have turned out as “poor me” people. I just can’t tolerate bad choices and taking no responsibility for them. It’s time to stand up and pull your big boy pants on and do what you need to do to succeed. You are not “entitled” to anything , you work for it. I so enjoy your words. Thanks to setting us all straight.
I especially loved your forward, there are exceptions to everything, but even in things you have no choice over, you can always choose how you deal with it.
Hi Larry,
At the moment I am in Frankfurt – Germany. The biggest Banks that controls European Eunioun are here. They just print papers and call that money. Do you know what So called Germans do all the day at their jobs – just stay in front of the PC and staring in one point. And on the top of that have to be with suits :))) And they have fear for their working places… and the systems is around fear…
SO funny…. DO you know that the biggest corporations here just can corrupt everything including the people. The minimum wage is 8.50 euro per hour . Even in McDonalds :))) So believe me I have not just traveling , but I have been experiencing living in different economic systems – including small countries in Eastern Europe. DO you know that here in Germany thay have ” Social Economic system” this means that the goverment take care for everything. If you don’t have home, they can give you from the local manicipility. If you earn less than 500 euro per month – you receive social benefits. Do you know that all the small companies here “pay under the table”, and have so much ” black labors”… and they are SLAVES!!
And the employees here are not guilty, because they want to work, they are not lasy… The problem is with people who want to take advantage of them… I can’t stand that… because I take care of people….
Yes we have choice – I was born in small Eastern European country – and I have to study – English, Greek, Russian and now German… and I have to go in university…to take bachelor, master degree, PDH…and so on… and I have to travel in differnt countries just to see not as a tourist but as a normal person what is like to live in different places – not just traveling and staying in 5 stars hotels. Just working and selling myself, myskills, my education.
So in the end of the day here on German student – give less energy to the sociaty than me, because he have German passport. And in the other Places in the world some people have minimum wage 150 euro.
Even in USA you dont have so called ” Social Economic model” Even in the USA you have to work hard, to sell, to give customer service…
And in Germany – the goverment and the biggest corporations – corrupt everything – thats why English people call Germans ” Easilly lead Bullies” , because most of the people have no idea what’s going on in this economy. .. that can not make the differance…
And here in my manicipily you can see everywhere Porsches..”Symbol of stupidity” as you call thieses cars….Here in my town you can see all the bankers – the richest in Frankfusrt and in Germany….
And on the top of that, in the other side are illegal workers, that can not speak a word , and that make services in the Hotels for the same rich people…
OK, if that is the socialy that we have to live today… Who controls this system, who says” In Germany will be social system and the minimum wage is 1300 euro” and in the other European Countries the minimum wage will be 150 euro…
Yes I have choice, I love your books, I have red all of them…
But here people even don’t try to make elementary customer service and sellings, because they are “Social system and economy” and they don’t have idea what is thas :))) Why to make selling ?!? Even elementary?!? The goverment take care of everything, even they don’t have to use their brains…
The foreigners here with the small restaurants… are more polite than the normal Germnas…
The systems will do all the job, the system is Social, people don’t know what is to start from the -1 or 0, and what is like if you lose your German passport… The system and the biggest corporations in the World are based here, they produce cars and the 4th economy in the World is here…
And on the top of that… You can see … illgal workers preparing food for the bankers, and cleaning their hotel rooms…
Yes who have choice for what?!? Do I have to close my eyes?!?
Yes I have choice – I can close my eyes… but not my human conciousness… because I can see … and feel the pain of other human beeings… and the zombies out there….
What is your advice to me… to one Young person, that make her life to have a choice… no matter where.. in personal live, career path, physicall fitness… What is your advice to me…
Seeing this system… here in Germany… the system that makes the other small countries slaves, and the own sitizens robots….
In response to Magda, above. I live in France. It’s the same situation here. Corruption from the elites and slavery inflicted upon the people by a social security system that basically robs them of their power of choice. What can you do about the system other than voting against it in the next elections? That’s the first choice.
Then, the other thing you can do is chose to change the world at YOUR level by helping people out, by making them realize that they can chose a different path. Then the ultimate choice is how you chose to let reality affect you. Again this is a choice, perhaps the most important of all. You have the power to chose an empowering or dis-empowering alternative to what you are feeling and interpreting. So chose wisely.
You have the skills, education and brains to do whatever you want. You are awake compared to the zombie masses. Basically you are FREE. Free to chose. “Be the change you want to see in the world.” said Gandhi. There is no other way to wake YOU up and wake people up.
Laurent Beretta
How exactly are you robbed of your power of choice? Did you get married? Did you have a kid? Did you go to school? Did you apply for a job or just handed one. give me a break.
Thanks Laurent!!
Hi Larry;
Thanks for your continued good work.
Your blog reminded me of something I read recently that struck a chord. The main character in a novel said ‘There is no right or wrong. Only choices.’
I have thought about this a lot and it seems to me that the author was trying to say that ‘right and wrong’ as merely inventions of society…that they are too subjective to be ‘worth’ anything. And, by looking at EVERYTHING as a choice puts the emphasis on the individual’s perception of right and wrong, and not the outside world’s perception of it.
I wonder how YOU feel about that statement Larry? Couldn’t ‘right and wrong’ be re-framed as ‘Good choices and Bad choices?’
Thank you for your words and reminders of what most of us already know, but sometimes forget. Years ago I was introduced to the concept of victim minded vs. accountable minded and it has driven me in my decisions, been my strength in times of difficult situations and for as long as I can remember I have believed that “we do what we want to do”. If it is that important to us, we will find a way to make it happen.
Will I be a victim in this situation or will I be accountable for my life?
Will I place blame and have excuses or will I look at what I could do differently and how I infuence the situation?
If it’s meant to me, it’s up to me!
Too many people take the easy way of just blaming everyone and everything else for the mediocre life they are living. It’s harder to take control of your life and make it better yourself. But, if you wait around for someone else to give you the life you want, you’ll be waiting forever.
Brilliant! I’m a firm believer and have seen this work in my own life.
I could be a victim… I have plenty of excuses. I was sexually abused as a child, raped 2 times as a teen, grew up in poverty (often without heat), my mother abandoned me at 8 and remained married to the man who molested me. I continued the cycle of abuse and living impoverished when I married my first husband. He was irresponsible and bankrupt. He beat me. I abused drugs for many years, being addicted to pot, cocaine and later meth. I was homeless a few times.
I worked on CHANGE. I forgave those in past for being human. I asked for forgiveness too. I quit smoking cold turkey in 2000. I got clean of all substances a year or so before that. I put myself through school at the community college and worked hard. I viewed each job as an opportunity to learn new skills so I could market them. I sought new jobs which required those skills and which offered a bit more money. I decided I would never be a victim again. I realized I could choose how I responded to things.
Today I am VERY happily married to a wonderful, respectful, responsible, supportive and loving man. His past unlike mine. LOL. I am an finance and operations Manager at a global company making six figures. We are debt free, including our house. We have 1.4M in the bank for retirement. We travel often and love our life.
It was that I was LUCKY. I worked very hard to pull myself out of poor living and a cycle of abuse. It took many years of consistent, good decision making, to get where I am. It also took great discipline. That is the key to changing my life. I did it! Therefore, I will never buy the BS that others cannot. I’m living proof.
Great post Larry, agreed with every word. Loved the rant. Keep enlighting minds, love your work. -Zachary