Is Direct Communication Abusive?
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In this rant, Larry answers accusations of being verbally and emotionally abusive when he tells people their results are their own fault. Seriously? Political correctness gone berserk!
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We’ve become a society of weenies. Think about it: we get bad service, for the most part we don’t do a thing about it. We walk down the street and watch people throw their trash on the ground, but we don’t want to say anything to them. Whats happened to us? Well it has to stop. That’s why I wrote this book, Grow a Pair: How to Stop Being a Victim and Take Back Your Life, Your Business, and Your Sanity. Its exactly what we need right now in this country. Click Here to learn more.
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Kudos, Larry. Sometimes the truth sometimes hurts. I tell students they’re failing because they want to be. Otherwise, it’d be different. In order to fix problems, one has to first acknowledge its existence.
Larry, I agree with you 100%. People are just weenies. There are far too many followers and not enough leaders. I have found out in my life that you don’t take a stand, you just sit on the side lines and nothing gets done. You have to take the lead. Most people just love to take the free handouts. No one wants to work for anything, anymore.
Where did this woman get the information that you use profane language in your books, presentations, or any other of your profesiional activities? I have read all your books, watched as many of your videos as I can and have never seen the words outlined by her While I have never had the honor of hearing you in person, I have talked to folks who have, and they say you never have used the profanities that this person accuses you of. The FIrst Ammendment is still in force is it not? The blogger has her right to her opinion but not the right to have her own facts. Keep up the good work Larry!!
There is a very short list of people whose videos I will listen to in their entirety. Larry, you are at the top of that list. Another classic. It’s one thing to take shots, but get your facts straight lady! If I don’t do enough to grow my business today, it’s my fault. Sick and tired of people who think we should all get a trophy just for showing up. If I don’t make enough money this year, it’s my own fault. I’ve got all the knowledge I need (including an investment of time with you and Joe Calloway), and if I don’t apply it…it’s my own fault. Hell, even the birds in the background are screaming at this lady!
It’s so easy to blame someone else that some people don’t even realize they’re doing it.
She sounds like a classic psychopath.
Full disclosure: I am a survivor of domestic violence.
By calling directness “Abuse!,” it makes everyone who is doesn’t like what is said to them an abuse victim equal to the horror that I and so many others (who suffered far worse than I did) have lived.
Words can be hurtful, and most victims of domestic violence have been the target of verbal degradation. However, there is an enormous difference between being direct and calling a spade a spade, and being abusive. This blogger’s comments have done a disservice to her readers and to you, Larry.
i know you care enough about people to help them and that is only what your trying to do–sometimes the cold hard truth hurts sometimes and alot of people wont accept it so they get offended. its not like your doing it to be mean. i CAN TELL YOU DO CARE ABOUT PEOPLE.. i listen to your videos evertime you send one-. i think your a good wake-uo call for many people who make alot of wrong decisions.People are human and do make some bad choices and then deny they are resposible.. But,, most of the time, except for a few exceptions. in their life–they are responsible for their situation.
Not that I have a problem with it, but…PISS…an excremental word. But…WHO CARES?!?! Circumstances may be out of your control, but results are always in your control.
If nothing is ever your fault, then nothing is ever your achievement either. You can’t claim success without claiming your failures. Why do they get to pick and choose what to take responsibility for? What makes them so special?
The truth hurts. Cliche? Yes. However cliche, apparently you hit on one of her hurts (her truth); something in your speech rang true for her. You hit her where it hurts. (I’m on cliche kick today… humor me!)
In my opinion, she and her followers aren’t very bright to be lashing out at you. By their rationale, you could just blame someone else. It’s not your fault she was in the crowd. Why isn’t she angry and lashing out at the people who hired you? They must appreciate your work and share your values or they wouldn’t have hired you to ‘verbally abuse people’. Duh!
AMEN Larry!!!
Oh man, that woman has a problem! I know for a fact that you do not use those ‘f’ and ‘s’ words when you are on the stage …….and you haven’t used them in my presence either and I’ve worked with you for over a year now. You are one of the most respectful, professional, direct and supportive mentors EVER!
It’s critical that people surround themselves with individuals and professionals like you – more people would be more successful (and THAT would be their own fault, LOL) –
Being a victim is one thing – having and maintaining a victim mentality is another.
Keep up the good work, Larry. I applaud you for addressing this directly. That’s why I love and respect you!
Pat
Lack of accountability and responsibility are ruining our country. Thanks for keeping the truth alive and not letting the whack jobs get out of hand. Keep doing your thing Larry, don’t stop!
Excellent post, as usual. I’d love to know the reason that one man commented that no one should ever be told anything is their fault. I’m trying to figure out what basis their is for such a belief and the only one I can come up with is people who don’t feel they should ever be held accountable for their actions, which is something all of us have seen all too often. I work 2 jobs, 1 full-time and 1 part time as a cashier in a grocery store. We’ve had 2 teenage girls from the same family hired to work there as baggers / general help, which means they have to round up the shopping carts, empty the trash, clean the restrooms, etc.
BOTH girls (who worked a different times) were known for slacking off, lying about whether their duties had been completed and trying to wheedle the male baggers into doing the more distasteful work – trash, restrooms, etc. When they were disciplined for it, their dad showed up and fought with our manager. He basically stated that his girls NEVER would do anything wrong and the store was at fault for trying to make them do the job for which they’d been hired, then had both girls quit. The worst part, aside from the fact that he’s doing these girls a HUGE disservice in how they’ll behave in the future, is the fact that he’s in the ARMY! You’d think he’d be the first to insist they do what they agreed to do.
It’s a shame because he’s crippling their ability to understand what responsibility is – who knows who long it will take them to figure out for themselves what it means, if they ever do.
Keep fighting the good fight and as Gandhi said, “Be truthful, gentle and fearless.”
Thank you. My spouse has been telling me for years that I have been ripping him a new one whenever I would try to address problems in our marriage. Any problem that was addressed was seen as an attack. When my husband sent me this video, I was so grateful. Now we can finally start addressing our marriage issues and turn our distant relationship into a real marriage where we can support each other in a manner that really makes a difference. Not a “fake” support that just superficially makes us feel let off the hook for the moment but unable to change in the long run. Keep up the good work! And thanks for taking a hit for all of us straight shooters.